There was an old demon who lived in a crypt
that had so many coffins, and candles that dripped
He broke up with Dru, so he got really ripped
and he needed some help when he got himself chipped

The good guys he asked, they were helpful alright
They got him some ropes and they tied him up tight
Even though he was no longer able to fight
They still didn't trust him for even one night

Willow was hurting, she casted a spell
To make a reality out of her will
Buffy was talking about Spike, until
"Why don't you just marry him!" shouted poor Will

So Spike, back at Giles', got down on one knee
And asked the big question, and so, tearfully
Buffy was being indecisiveness girl
"Oh make me the happiest man in the world!"

They planned right away to get married in haste
And Buffy went out, with no time to waste,
to brag to the guy who was trying to win 'er
She asked the poor guy to the damn wedding dinner!

Excitely Buffy described her new beau
Clearly the news was a heck of a blow
Riley was hurt.  He could not comprehend...
"Well he's not as old as my LAST boyfriend"

To make a long story a little bit shorter
Buffy and Spike had no single supporter
The spell was undone, the two parted ways
and forgot the whole thing to the end of their days

Forgot it completely, that's what they both did
They never imagine it, heaven forbid
Yep, and they never remember the kissing
And cuddling, which they are both REALLY not missing

They don't reminisce, they don't fantasize
They don't want to gaze into each others' eyes
That's why, when much later, poor Buffy was hurting
she didn't grab Spike for a kiss and some flirting

'Cause something like that wouldn't happen again
Nope, kissing a demon was not on her brain
Smooching with Spike, in his long swirling coat
was not what would make her breath catch in her throat

So the kissing, and later the long nights of passion,
like sex was about to be way out of fashion,
obviously couldn't happen at all
'cause Buffy and Spike, as you prob'ly recall

didn't enjoy being engaged in the least
the beautiful slayer and her sexy beast
hated each other, and both of them knew it
the spell was a hell just to make their way through it
it makes them both vomity, just to review it
Yep, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it